Tuesday, May 4, 2010

More Work to be Done...

   Man today was such an exciting but frustrating day that I just cant believe it. There were so many different things that happened...I'm just glad the day's just about over with, but in a way not. The good thing is that I get to see him in person. That always brightens my day no matter how bad it has been.
    Well, anyways. The day started out with my waking up at my parents. I slept a little bit later then usual because it was just too quiet there. I normally fall asleep with the tv on or some sort of background noise. I have gotten so used to it that I just cant sleep in the quiet anymore. It was weird, I mean i heard off and on the various sirens running, but that for me is usual to hear living here. Anyways, I just couldnt sleep really. So I slept when I finally was able to sleep til about 11:30 this morning. I woke up feeling rested and just great.
    After catching some sleep, I went downstairs to grab me some yummy food and to just relax and finish writing down some notes before I left for my recruiters meeting. I ate some breakfast and began relaxing. I was talking with my dad and he finally got up and began getting ready for work. I began looking up various things online to learn some more information about the lifestyle. I found some good information and then began talking with him. It was a shock for him to be online, but I was happy to talk with him though.
    After talking with him for some time, i began to get frustrated when my dad came down and told me that i needed to learn how to sit in a skirt. This just frustrated the crap out of me because I was sitting just fine and not showing anything. I told it to him and he thought it was hilarious. My parents just seem to try to control every aspect of me possible. I dont think they like that theyre losing all control after I go to basic because I will officially be financially independent of them. But it was just they are more strict then he is, but his punishment are worse. I admit that I hate just how strict and controlling they are because I'm twenty years old. I know that I hate how they are, but when it comes to him and how he controls me it's different. I dont know how to explain it other then with him its way different.
    Anyways, enough rambling about my parents misguided and wrong skills. I was given an insight by him at some of the things he was looking at. I was shown a picture of an item he was looking at, vibrating nipple clamps. I saw those and I knew instantly he was right when he said it was more fun for him then me. I know I've only had nipple clamps on once, although they weren't really nipple clamps they were binder clips functioning as nipple clamps. I couldnt believe the sensations it created when they were taken off. I felt this when I saw the picture of the vibrating clamps. I knew for sure that he was in an evil mindset and have been wondering since then all day what else he was looking at. It was funny in a way though because he sent me a picture of a vibrator that hooks up to your ipod. I can only imagine what would happen to me if I was to use that during a run like he mentioned. I dont think my thoughts would be focused on my ipod or the run at all, but what was going on inside me. I'm for sure thinking that would be one interesting run. I'm curious to see what all he has been looking at and thinking about.
    Well after torturing me with mentioning my punishment and that it would sometime that I didnt know when or what it would be. That combined with the torture of not being able to see what else he was looking at was a lot. I couldnt believe how the curiosity was killingme. Anyways, I knew that it wouldnt be long before both would be resolved, but he knows just how not knowing what things are kills me as my mind reels and keeps going on it all day long.
    After that discussion, I headed off to my commander's call. I had so much fun there and finally got to sign my contract. We talked some business and then went to the park to do our pt session. We did our usual pushups, situps and 1.5 mile run. I ended up doing 32 pushups, 47 situps and the run sucked. i felt so horrible, but it was maily my fault. I didnt drink but one bottle of water and I knew I needed to drink more, especially around that time of the month because you're body gets dehydrated a little easier then. I hated the feeling and felt upset at myself because I had let him down. I tried my best, but it just seemed I felt so exhausted and worn out. I was so happy though that some of the guys came back and ran with me the last little bit that I had to finish. It made me feel good and I knew that I had to work on some things before the next meeting.
     I found out a lot of information today and cant wait to get things situated. Things are going to take a while to get done paperwork wise, but i know what I have to do. I cant believe either that I have to come to the office every week once June hits to check in and weigh in to make sure I'm maintaining my weight. I do have to say that wont be an issue because I'm slowly losing weight as it is from cutting out fastfood from my diet. Now granted I can eat it here and there but I havent really eaten any in about two weeks now and have lost about 5-6 pounds or so.
    Anyways...today was amazing but frustrating and I cant wait to have another day. Tomorrow should be fun with work, but I'm sure I'll stay safe. Who knows what tomorrow holds, but I'm always optimistic that it will be something good.

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