“men want to dominate, to master, because they are insecure. They want to control their environment. They want to control anything and everything that affects their lives. They want to be sure that what they have today they will also have tomorrow.
“Wait a minute you say, isn’t it about sex? Don’t men want to have a willing woman available any time, day or night? Sure, any man who denies it is lying, but there’s more to it. Yes he does want to find you there whenever he rolls over in bed in the middle of the night, but he also wants to know you will be there tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. He wants you to be the friend who’s always there, the one he can share his secrets with, the one he can trust. Yes, trust, surprised? You hear so much about how a good submissive builds trust in her master, but you don’t think about the rest of it. He has to trust you as well, trust that you will keep his secrets, trust that you will be there for him, trust that you won’t walk out or turn on him.”
“It goes back to that basic insecurity. He wants a woman he can spend a lifetime with, but he has that craving for control, to make sure everything is done his way. Who can best answer that need? Someone who loves him, is devoted to him, wants to serve him, take care of him, but also someone who will obey him, defer to his judgment, be it right or wrong, someone who can allow herself to become dependent on him. What type of woman would best be suited to a role like that?”
“The answer is obvious to all of you here: a deeply submissive woman,” he continued. “Each one of you has chosen to submit to your master. Why you choose to submit is another topic, but you submit knowing that it means you accept his unrestricted authority over your lives. Is it what he really wants? Yes, and don’t ever doubt it. Your submission is like a powerful narcotic drug to him. The more he gets from you, the more he wants. It draws him to you, an attraction more powerful than you can imagine.
“As a submissive it must seem that you take all the risks. You give him everything, yet he could abandon you on a whim. Reality is far different. The more you draw him in, the more power you give to him through your submission, the more he will desire you. Can you walk away from him on a whim? No? Well, he can’t either. You are fulfilling dreams he has had since childhood. He would no more abandon you than he would cut off his arm. Remember this: just as his dominance holds you to him, so your submission holds him to you.
“To me, domination is not about what I actually do, but the potentials, what I could do if I wished. If I were so inclined I could order Sarah to crawl on the floor barking like a dog. Am I going to do that? No, it would be silly. But I know I have the ability to make her do that if I wanted it. See the distinction? That’s why your master isn’t some kind of abusive monster. He doesn’t need to prove he’s in charge by issuing a constant stream of orders and rules, to put you through some degrading or humiliating scene. Rather he sees, from how you obey him, that his power over you is there anytime he wants it.”
Reading this section, I am reminded at times when I lose it, just how much my Master loves me. He is the reason that I do what I do, but at the same time there are reasons that He does what He does. Honestly, I never thought about why He is the way that He is, but this made me stop and think about it.
My Master is an amazing man. After this section, I had to go back and reread it another time again. I never realized that Masters are men that are actually afraid of losing what they have. Me and Master have talked before about how we would die if we ever lost each other because we love each other so much. It’s crazy how you can love someone so much, but be so vulnerable to them too. Every time He makes a choice or judgment for me, He is also making sure that I am taken care of.
Thinking of trust, me and Him talked about it a lot and I realize now that it wasn’t just about how much I trusted Him. I realize now that it actually didn’t take me very long at all to trust Him. There was just something about Him that was different then any of the others that had come before Him. He was different, but the trust thing wasn’t just about me. It was about how much He trusted me too. I realize now that He has to trust me just as much to make sure that I don’t reveal His secrets and that I will always be there for Him.
That goes back to the whole part of the quote “He doesn’t need to prove he’s in charge by issuing a constant stream of orders and rules, to put you through some degrading or humiliating scene. Rather he sees, from how you obey him, that his power over you is there anytime he wants it.” My Master truly cares about me and if He didn’t, He wouldn’t be working as hard as He does to make things work like He does. He doesn’t order me around to crawl or do things that seem silly and just plain weird, but He relies on me to do things not because He orders me to, but because I submit to Him and give Him that power over me.
I love my Master because of the power He has over me, but I also know that at the same time the power He has also is a great responsibility for Him. Knowing this, I am so proud to be called His lil one and to be His submissive and soon to be submissive wife. It will be hard, but I look forward to making Him proud and following His orders whether they are spoken or unspoken.