Monday, August 13, 2012

Ranting and raving all about family....

    This past weekend has been crazy hectic and just full of family time and running around to various places and trying to take care of a slightly sick lil penguin on top of it and Master's grandmother. Lets just say that me and His grandmother dont get along very well anymore and now it is pretty much tolerating her because we dont want to exclude his grandfather from seeing our lil penguin.
    So i have to get this out of my system about the family and all because if not i feel i will go insane. Master's grandmother is more of a tolerance now because she has said a lot of things about me and i just cant deal with them anymore. Shortly after Master and i had our wedding ceremony, we went to His niece's birthday party. Everything seemed fine and she had been so nice to me as Master and i got to know each other and after i got back from my job training. Come to find out she was talking about me at the birthday party. She went up to His ex and was asking her "dont you miss Him? dont you want to get back together with Him? why dont you get back together with Him" and other comments like that after the two of US were married!!! Then to add insult to injury once we found out we were pregnant she went and bought a crib and all sorts of clothes without even asking us about it. We went up to visit and i explained that we had set the crib up and that my parents had bought it because it was a family tradition for us. The look on her face was priceless as she just seemed shocked that we had a crib and made that we already had one and that my parents had bought it. Master's grandfather on the other hand asked us if there was anything else that we needed instead and whatever it was they would get it for us. He is the only reason that i put up or even go visit because he has always been kind and sweet to me and not said anything bad at all. So we told them a glider and then his grandfather told us he would get it because thats what we needed.
    The biggest straw was just recently when i gave birth to our lil penguin. My parents had been told from the beginning they were the first to see her because they hadnt been down here to witness the pregnancy and see me develop or even be present for the ultrasound or doctor visit where we found out the sex. Due to this, i felt that i wanted my parents to see her first and then Master's mother because they were the immediate family and then the rest of the family in whatever order. Because our lil penguin was born so early in the morning, no family was able to get there until later. My parents were on the road driving as i was pushing her out. Well anyways...His grandmother got there with His mother and grandfather and she assumed because she got there early she was going to get to see her first. Boy was she wrong...even though we had to wait for my family to get there, the decision still stood. So finally the time came after Master and i saw her to let the family go see her and each then He went up with each of them. My mother went first and i was telling them while they were in the room that my dad was next and then His mom and then His grandmother. When i said this, she got extremely upset and stormed out of the room. She was under the impression that i was going to let her in first since she had gotten there first that morning. Thankfully Master was able to explain the situation and she cooled off. It hurt me that she expected me to give her special privilages just because she was there early and other things.
     Then the latest straw is that she automatically assumed that Master and i were going to have our lil penguin dedicated at their church and had already made plans with the pastor and bought the dress. She didnt even discuss with us that we wanted to do it, but kept bugging Master about what sunday we were going to do the dedication. Master and i already had her dedicated while she was in the NICU by the same chaplain that had married the two of us. It was important to us that He be able to do it and He was able to. just made me mad that she didnt even ask us and then guilted Master into doing it. The only reason i did it and He did it was because it was for His grandfathers' benefit. The two of them were going to watch it. After having her dedication this weekend, i know it was worth it when His grandfather who hasnt preached in years led the prayer over her and His grandfather couldnt be prouder.
    THe last and most frustrating thing about her is she keeps giving us evil looks when we say something she doesnt like. Master has been used to her and knows how to filter her out, but i dont yet. She gave Him an evil look when we said that we didnt find a pair of stockings to put on her that she gave us(which we gave away to charity here because i dont want our daughter to wear a pair of used tights that we dont know where they came from). She has given me an evil look about 3-4 times now and basically coming across as if she is telling me that im a bad mother because she has mentioned how lil penguin's legs feel cold to her and that she can cover her up if i just hand her a blanket. When she says this i feel her feet because those are what we judge whether to cover her up most of the time because they get cold the fastest(her feet are like my feet and cold for the most part when in air conditioning and left out too long). All the times she says that, our lil penguin is perfectly fine and actually towards the warm side. When i tell her she's fine, she looks at me as if to say that shes upset because she thinks she needs to be covered. Sorry, but im not letting anyone other than me and Master parent our child.
     Yesterday Master and i were hesitant about who we let hold her because she is getting over being sick and we dont want her passed around to a lot of people that we dont know and also dont know if they're sick or just getting over being sick. With her being a preemie, her immune system is at more of a risk so we have to take some precautions for her. Anyways....she got upset because i wouldnt let one of her friends hold her yesterday during the service because i didnt know her. While out to eat, Master told me that she made a comment to His mother when she put lil penguin back in the car seat after soothing her for a minute that Master's mother had put her back just in the nick of time because as she put her back in the car seat i came around the corner. It seems she's upset with me because i dont let people feed her or hold her too much when she's asleep because it messes up her pattern. We let people hold her when she's awake because obviously thats the best time to see her and her personality as it develops. But to say that about me to His mother is like a WTF moment. Seriously?? You are going to talk bad about me like that in front of Master and His grandfather and have no class whatsoever.
    It is just nerve wracking because i am trying to be nice, but i also have to deal with her when we go to visit His grandfather and try to be nice so that he can see lil penguin. I guess i have to work on my least we dont have to visit too often because Master feels the same way about them that i do and we have the dedication out of the way. Now i get to focus on going back to school and getting myself better and taking care of Master and our lil penguin :D

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