Friday, April 9, 2010

Is There Any Mercy Left?

  Man today has been filled with both good and bad things happening. I guess it all started off first thing this morning. I woke up and fixed myself a snack and lunch so that I didnt have to worry about buying anything even if I cashed my paycheck. Well I got an early morning text right as I woke up from him. I think that he is a mind reader because it always seems that he texts me right as I'm waking up. But back to work...I got to work and was going to pick up my check after work, but found out that I didnt have to be into work until five that night. I felt so stupid that I didnt check the schedule the night before. Thankfully I had plenty of time I could go home and take a nap. I decided because they were getting their butts kicked that i would get my paycheck later.
         I went home and took a nap enjoying the peace and quiet of the apartment, but wishing that I could spend the time talking with him. Although much to my sadness he was at work so I could only talk to him by texting. But the day passed by and I took a nap. The day seemed to be going pretty well, until I checked my mail. I had a huge bad piece of news waiting in the mail for me.
          I opened a letter from my doctor's office thinking it was notifying me of the negative results of my pap smear. But it was quite the opposite. It was letting me know that they had found some abnormal cells and didnt know why they were there or the cause. They also stated that I tested positive for the HPV virus, which didnt mean that I had cervical cancer but was at a higher risk for getting it. I read those lines over and over again and flipped out. I immediately began trying to make sense of it because in my mind the only words that I could comprehend was cancer. I felt lost all of a sudden and didnt know what to do. I tried reaching my sister and mom, trying to get in touch with either one of them for that comfort. i texted him, hoping not to freak him out, but I felt he deserved to know what was going on. Much to my comfort he didnt flip out or freak and just calmly said it was probably something minor(at least minor in my mind). But I finally got a hold of my sister and she helped calm me down by telling me other people have had that same results and it was something benign and nothing to worry about. My mother said much of the same thing and told me that when I found out my doctor's appointment date she would take off and come with me.
         After that I got to work and cashed my check. It was $65, more then I thought I was going to make. It was amazing. I cashed it and went into work. Work went by so amazingly fast that I cant believe it did. I was out on runs every 5-10 minutes or so and made tips on every single one. Most of the time the tips were at least $2. I loved it and had so much fun driving around. I loved it and cant wait to go back and do it again tomorrow. I got off work and counted out my money and tips and found out that in the course of 4 hours I had made $45. I couldnt believe it. That's money to pay one of my bills. I think tips tomorrow will go to my parents for my car insurance.
          I got home and felt so exhausted that I figured I would go ahead and sleep. I also figured that he would be at work and that I wouldnt be able to speak with him tonight. i think it's sad, but in a good way that I miss not talking to him. I laid down and couldnt sleep. It was as if I was waiting to hear back from him, since I hadnt heard from him since I had clocked out of work. I felt bad though because he logged on later tonight and he reminded me that I had forgotten something crucial that I am supposed to do everynight. I couldnt believe I had forgotten something so easily. I feel horrible and have realized that I need to make sure it's always done even if I'm extremely tired. I only hope he'll be understanding and show a little mercy.
       I have to admit that I loved how he calmed me down after I was stressing and getting worried about the letter I got. It's funny how sometimes just seeing him makes the bad things that have happened in the day, much better. I'm glad he's around more and more everyday

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