Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Such a Busy Day

 Wow what a crazy but amazing day! I cant believe all that has happened in such a short span of time, but I dont think I would change today for all the money in the world. I loved it and can't wait for this weekend to come! This weekend is going to be so amazing.

    The day started with me waking up around 11ish. I had slept off and on last night, but for some reason I woke up around 3 am. I have no idea why I did, but it seemed I tossed and turned and slept lightly the rest of the day. I have no idea why, but I did. I was just glad I was able to sleep like I did, for some reason I think it was because my new roommate wasnt home slamming doors all around the house.

    Well after getting up and waking up to the good morning text message I have grown accustomed to, I ate some breakfast. I couldnt believe how amazing it tasted, but I had some cereal that I hadnt eaten in a while. It's weird how a food can taste so good when you havent had it in years. I dont know why I got it, but I guess because it was cheap and would help me get through the day.

    Anyways...after eating breakfast I started my plans for the day. I had planned on going through all my stuff I was taking to my parents and packing everything but my tv into my car. It was so amazing and felt so good as i cleaned my rom and went through everything. I ended up getting ready of a bit more stuff and couldnt believe that I could pack a little bit more into a couple of the containers. After packing I felt so amazed, but didnt like the fact that my room seemed really bare now. There was no decorations or anything up on my wall, but I like it this way because it means I'm one step closer to moving out of this place and closer to being back in his arms. I love the feeling of being in his arms.

    I started on my list of taking care of things by packing up my car with things to take to Goodwill. My list ranged from stopping at Walmart for gas, cash my check at Walmart, return my pullup bar, drop my stuff off at Goodwill, cash my check for my phone, and pay my rent and talk with management. It's weird how looking at a list of what you have done makes you feel so accomplished with all that has been done in the day. I went through the list and ended up getting $20 for my pullup bar in cash. I didnt have my receipt and was thinking that I was going to get a Walmart card for a set amount, but I ended up getting cash. This was amazing because it was $20 that I didnt have before.

    Well after that I finished up my errands and only used a small amount of gas, I headed back to my apartment. It seemed that there was so much that I had gotten done in a small amount of time and I was proud of myself. I had done so much and still had a good bit to do. After getting home and paying my rent, I had to go and pick up my room. I decided to pack my car since the management was in a conference call. I have no idea what they were talking about, but it took a while. I packed my car instead and found that my room appeared so bare. I have nothing left in it, but my television and suitcase and backpack. It seems so uncluttered now, but my car seems to be extremely cluttered now. Well, its not really cluttered but with all my boxes of stuff in it my car appears cluttered.

    I finished packing my car and headed back into my room. I had found a few things that I could take to the pawn shop to get some extra cash. I didnt really care or know if they would even take it, but it was worth a shot. I had an old voice recorder, a safebox, and a toolset. I hadnt used the toolset ever and my thought is I didnt want it taking up space. I knew that I could keep it with him, but to me I dont like to take up a lot of space at his place even though he said I could keep whatever i didnt want my parents to have there. My other idea was that I also needed the money and if I hadnt used it then it is better to sell it. So I took them to the pawn shop and ended up getting $30 for the whole lot. In all honesty, I could have gotten more, but I was willing to take what I could get. The voice recorder was an older style and the lockbox only had one key. I can understand and was glad to get what I did, especially since I wasnt really expecting anything. I was really happy because this means I can pay my parents the insurance for the month and get them off my back. I am sure I will figure it out this weekend.

    Which I am so excited for this weekend. I cant believe it, but I get to go visit him this weekend. It all started with an innocent text of him telling me to come see him and I replied jokingly back "okay i'm on my way". i thought about it and when he replied with "really? dont mess with me", i realized that I could see him this weekend. I could leave when I got off work on Friday and drive down to see him and come back up on Monday before my flight leaves. I loved the idea and couldnt believe it. I ran it by him and he was in agreement too that it would be amazing for me to come down. I cant believe it, but I get to see his lovely face and get to run into his arms a week and a half earlier then we were planning on. I love it and cant wait to see him. I have missed him so much and in the short time we have been apart, I know my heart has grown even fonder for him. The feelings I have for him are so strong and there's just nothing else like it. I dont know how to describe them and it's amazing because I hear a song or see a license plate or anything else that reminds me of him and I find myself smiling like crazy. It's like the other night at work I was talking about him and just started smiling out of no where and my coworker asked me what i was smiling so big for. I told him it was because of my boyfriend and he was like awww. It's such an amazing feeling and I really cant wait to be back in his arms for this weekend. it will make the last week and a half bearable until I can get back in his arms again.

    The night has gone so well. I ate dinner and then went and worked out. My workout didnt go amazingly great, but it was so much fun because his voice was there in me towards the end. I got done with the first 10 minutes and had put in for running 30 minutes. i started to feel myself fading and knew that I would have to find some good music. I ended up finding a good song and made a plan to get through each song. I cant remember what the first one was, but it started a string of songs that made me think of him and how he would be cheering me to finish my run. One of them happened to be one of his favorites and the titles says it all "Love Your Love the Most" and then it was followed by "I'm Already There" by Lonestar. I loved it and it helped me get through my workout. It was as if with those songs, there was alittle voice of his helping to coach me by going "Come on little one, I know you can do it. it's not much longer". I love how he motivates me and he's not even here. He motivates me to always do my best and to be my best. I love how he pulls this out of me because no one has done it before. My parents might think they did while I was in school, but in reality they only made me be as good as I was because they used threats and cowardish tactics to impress upon me certain things to be done.

    I cant believe it, but I love just how amazing things are going lately. It seems that with him around when life gets me down, he pulls me back up. I dont have the best relationship with my parents, but with his encouragement and support I am trying to work on it and keep it, but it seems that may not be possible. I know that I can say that I put my best foot forward and tried my best with them, which is all that he asks of me is that I do my best. I love the confidence and everything that he gives me. There's so many qualities about him that make him so amazing and he seems to do nothing but bring out the best in me. I love the feelings and sensations he causes in me. I know this weekend will be amazing and i cant wait til June comes when I get to spend so much time with him. I love him and I know that spending that time with him will make me leaving in June that much easier knowing he will support me no matter what.

    I do have to say that i have outdone myself on the punishments. Well that might have been worded wrong, but I guess it's more of I jinxed myself when it came to punishments last time I visited him. I now have my count of spankings up to 20 and the belt is now 15. I admit I'm a little apprehensive about the belt spanking on bare skin, but I know that I deserve it especially for being sarcastic to him the other day. I love him and he was just trying to help me and all I did was snap at him. I still feel guilty about it and know that when I get that punishment out of the way I will feel better. For some reason, the punishments seem like a release to me of the guilt that I feel when I do something like that. I know that I have a lot to learn and I am glad that he is willing to teach me. I really am eager to learn more from him and always plan on trying my hardest. I just know I hope that he can tell I'm trying my hardest to learn and that I'm going to do my best to learn even though I know I will have occasional moments where I will get in trouble for a forgetful moment.

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