This past day and a half seems to me to be nothing but a mere dream, but i find myself constantly pinching myself to check and see if im awake. Checking to make sure that it isnt a dream and i have to wake up and get back to training. My world it seems for the past few months have existed with only mere minutes of me talking to Him. it is still hard to believe that i am finally back home and in His arms again.
Last night....oh my goodness last night. Thinking about it at this moment makes me drool and i love the thought of remembering every waking moment. The passion, the laughter, the snuggling, and most importantly the just being together. Since i have left, the only thing i have dreamed about was getting back to His arms and back to where i belong.
Teasing hands, caressing touches, and warm sensations He created in me were nothing short of breath taking. It seems that every minute i spend back with Him, i fall in love even more. Leaving Him for my training was the hardest thing i have ever had to do, but i see that for both me and Him it made me a stronger person. By a lot of what i dealt with, i have learned not to take crap from anyone and to stand up for myself...with Him there cheering me on from the thousand and some odd miles He was away. He taught me the most important lesson of all----to be true to myself and who i was and not back down for anyone. Since we have been talking, He has done nothing but encourage me to pursue what i want and what makes me happy while also being His lil one.
Hearing my name and receiving my collar last night, i found that it was the most amazing feeling in the world. In the past, i would have been cautious of walking out of the room with it on and just cautious that someone could even remotely possibly see me. He has caused me to become more confident in myself and my abilities. I proudly walked out of His room to get Him something to drink and found myself shrugging off the reaction if someone was to see me. He is my Master and is proud of me just as i am Him. My collar from Him is a sign of pride and that He is my owner. He is in control of me and everything i do.
Performing my duties and just getting back to finally being me and taking care of Master has been the greatest joy here. My Master has had me getting Him something to drink or just helping with things has been amazing feeling for me. i truly feel that i am back where i belong. It is going to take some time to ease back into things, but i know that Master will make sure it happens like it should. He has been nothing but understanding of all the mistakes and disasters and just plain grumpy moods and situations that i have put myself in. They are learning experiences and He has made me see just how much i have changed into the woman and submissive that i want to be. Realizing yet again that this is truly where im supposed to be has been the most rewarding experience ever and i cant wait for one day soon to be His lil one and His wife. For soon we shall be husband and wife too.
This weekend should be fun and interesting. Getting my lecture and 300 hits over with plus however many i have for my mouth and my bad words from earlier this week....oh man i cant wait to get it over wtih and be back to being Master's lil one that has a clean slate because i still feel guilty about that night that i made Him worry over me. I guess thats why He has this punishment because they always make me feel better and ease that guilt knowing that He is teaching me a lesson and will forgive me of it all once it is over with(not that He hasnt forgiven me but knowing i still have this punishment is the biggest piece of guilt ever)
Cant wait for Him to open His presents too......Should be super exciting and quite itneresting experience afterwards. Will have to update on that one after tonight. For now im just relishing in being His lil one and getting whatever He wants or asks for.