Wow, i cant believe it's been a good bit since i last posted on here. It seems that just when things start settling down, life likes to start getting hectic yet again. Master and i are both doing very well, but it seems that i have to figure out how to settle back down again.
Lately Master and i have been dealing with things from my work that have left me super stressed and worried and almost to the point of a mental break down. It takes a lot for me to get to the point of wanting to hurt someone(NEVER my daughter or Master) because they have pushed me to the point of breaking at work. People i was working with got hungry so i asked to do a food run for them and i got told no. Someone else asked someone who works for those over me and they got told yes, so i assumed it was okay. However it wasnt...i ended up getting in trouble and got some paperwork for it. It was an all around bad night that night because then i got chewed out for saying i didnt feel good to my supervisor's supervisor. He wasnt very happy about it at all:( and i was on the tail end of his anger.
These past few weeks i have had a lot to deal with concerning work. Adding into that, Master and i got sick :( then our little one got sick so we had to deal with her being sick. It is a lot to deal with and i feel that i have struggled a lot with making sure they're okay while also working and keeping up with school and just trying to play mom. Honestly, i feel that i have sucked at being supermom lately with everything.
Master and i are doing better and school has somewhat leveled out for now, but i still feel that i am failing to be the perfect sub and wife and mother that im supposed to be. MAster may not think so, but i feel so. When i clean, instead of things being cleaned as we go it seems that i have to clean in mass like every 2-3 weeks. It's crazy how backed up things can get and i feel so let down. Hopefully, i can get to a point where there is happy harmoney. Until then...any suggestions out there from fellow subs/slaves that can help me not feel like such a horrible sub and keep up with everything. There just seems to be no way to keep up with working at nights 13 hr shifts, sleeping for about 5 hrs, and taking care of a baby, eating, and taking care of Master.